Birth Control Pill Affects HOW Women Remember Emotional Events

Posted on September 19, 2011 by elizabeth

According to a recent study at UCI, “Women on the pill, who have lower levels of hormones associated with female reproduction, may remember emotional events similarly to men.”

In the study, when given the narrative of a traumatic car crash, women who were on the pill remembered the events similarly to how men remembered it; ie. they remembered the “gist” of the event while women NOT on the pill remembered more details.

“Men typically rely more on right-hemisphere brain activity to encode memory. They retain the gist of things better than details.”

Does this mean being on the pill makes a woman think like a man? The researchers agreed that:

“the findings could help lead to fuller answers about why women experience post traumatic stress syndrome more frequently than men, and how men remember differently than women.”

“What’s most exciting about this study is that it shows the use of hormonal contraception alters memory,” UCI graduate researcher Shawn Nielsen said. “There are only a handful of studies examining the cognitive effects of the pill, and more than 100 million women use it worldwide.”

She stressed that the medications did not damage memory. “It’s a change in the type of information they remember, not a deficit.”

Frankly, I think this study is completely fascinating for several reasons which I want to explore in a couple blog posts:

  1. My personal experience on the Pill (this post)
  2. The scary long-term implications of women losing their emotional/detail-oriented memory (another post)

I’ll start with my own experience.

Since being on the pill, my own symptoms of PTSD and Post-Partum Depression have been significantly reduced. It’s hard for me to say whether this is entirely because of the pill. But I can’t deny that the pill has definitively aided in balancing my whacked-out female hormones, regulated my periods–both of which have made me saner, calmer and better able to handle life.

That said, I really do NOT want the pill to be my long-term solution to hormonal imbalances. Especially if it means my emotional memory is being affected! My emotional memory makes me ME!

Then again, I gotta be honest….it’s been nice NOT to remember every.single.tiny.detail about every single emotional event. Being THAT sensitive is a burden.

Being on the pill has helped ease back the sharp edge of intense, almost photographic memory that I’ve had my entire life. The thing is, it’s not just that I can recall tiny details of emotional events, it’s that these recalls are also deeply FELT–to the point of overwhelm.

It’s not that I want to lose that kind of memory, but sometimes it can be debilitating–especially since I’m already an ENFP. I feel things so intensely as it is, that having whacked out hormones IN ADDITION to my personality type is totally overwhelming.

I could literally spend ALL my energy just trying to stabilize my emotions. Being on the pill helps turn down the emotional noise–does that make sense? I still feel deeply, but it doesn’t incapacitate me. See the difference?

The way my body works, here’s the pro/con breakdown of being OFF the pill:

  1. Start having extreme periods (bad)
  2. extreme flip-flopping sex drive–super intense or totally flat (sometimes good, sometimes horrible)
  3. experience life in a very intense, emotionally overwhelming way (sometimes good, sometimes bad)
  4. start having intense nightmares, PTSD symptoms again (bad)

And here’s the pro/con breakdown of being ON the pill:

  1. Regulated periods (good)
  2. Minimal PMS (good)
  3. Regulated sex drive (mostly good, sometimes annoying–ha!)
  4. Feeling saner (good!)
  5. Less prone to depressive thoughts (good!)
  6. Better able to manage life with five children (good!)
  7. Remember less emotional details (bad–maybe)

OK! I think that pretty much sums up the most TMI post I’ve ever written! (I fully expect 20 unsubscribe emails by noon!).

What are your thoughts? Does it bother you that the Pill affects how a woman remembers emotional events? Is this counterbalanced by the positive effects of the Pill? What are some of the ethical/moral implications to consider? I’d love to hear from you (friendly, civil discussion please!) before I write more on this….DISCUSS!

[DISCLAIMER!!! in case you aren't sure what I mean by friendly, civil discussion.....anyone who accuses me or other women for being bad Catholics because we're on the pill for medical reasons will probably be deleted. Unless you're nice. And send bags of Mint Milanos.]

[SECOND NOTE: I understand NFP. Thanks.]

[THIRD NOTE: I have five children. Clearly I believe in procreative sex. :D ]

[FOURTH NOTE: in lieu of nice comments, bags of Mint Milanos are welcome. Oh, wait. I already said that. Ahem.]

Discuss!

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  • http://stitchinguptheseams.wordpress.com/ Stitching Seams

    Huh. Interesting.

    I’m an INTJ (sometimes flopping over to INFJ), and I have polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS…enough acronyms yet? :) I started on birth control a year ago to control insanely debilitating and heavy and non-stop periods (as in, I bled for 3+ months straight). It’s pretty much the most fail-safe way to regulate my out-of-control hormones and deficits and such.

    I’ve noticed that I’ve been much more emotionally stable. I swear, my husband will receive heaps of crowns in heaven for dealing with me so gently and lovingly our first year of marriage before I finally went to the doctor. My mom especially noticed that my moods were more stable. Not to say that I don’t still have extreme emotional events…between my dad being diagnosed with terminal cancer, my grandfather dying, my husband being unemployed (but just getting a job) and me just getting a job, life has been crazy and I’ve experienced it all. But still…interesting.

    I do always get a little unnerved by the thought of procreative sex – I think because most of the people I know who refer to it as such believe that sex is ONLY for procreation, which leaves me feeling a) like a whore for enjoying sex and b) like less of a person since I may not even be able to conceive. I don’t think you’re one of those people, though. (My in-laws are!! What joy is mine.)

    Anyhow.

    For me, the benefits of being on the pill far outweigh the cons, for almost all of the reasons you listed along with the fact that I simply cannot bleed nonstop for so long anymore. I can’t. I’m deeply anemic as it is, and was dangerously so during that entire year. I wish I’d experience the lessening PTSD symptoms, though…they’re going away for now as they always do at the end of summer (mine are linked to being sexually assaulted in college, and usually occur between late January (the time of the attack) through early September (the time it took for me to completely shut down emotionally after the attack happened)). 

    Thank you for your ever-even writing. I love reading what you have to say, even about topics as controversial as this.

  • http://www.faithpermeatinglife.com/ Jessica

    This is really interesting for me as a woman who is NOT on the Pill. (We practice NFP.) Because I don’t remember tiny details of emotional events. For example, my husband and I were in a bad car accident a few years back (hit by a semi, did a 180, slammed into the median, escaped unhurt by the grace of God). I was driving at the time and have barely any memory of what happened between the time we got hit and the time we were standing next to the car surveying the damage.

    So I guess what I’m saying is… just like it would be inaccurate to say that the Pill “damages” women’s memories, it’s also inaccurate to say that every woman has this super-human photographic memory that gets taken away by the Pill.

    Also, on a somewhat unrelated note, I’ve ended up with shorter periods and no more cramps since I started using a DivaCup. It’s pretty awesome.

  • KatR

    I’m thinking that with the correct birth control pill/Xanax combo, I could quit therapy all together.

    And to the guys who read Elizabeth’s blog, it’s about to get real up in here. Feel free to step out if you need to. Don’t try and be a hero.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1071854538 Kristen Herrett

    For medical reasons even if I weren’t Catholic, I CANNOT be on the Pill. (I have a blood clotting disorder similar to Jen Fulwiler’s of Conversion Diary). This was probably God’s way of saving my husband because any more hormones (think pregnancy) and I’m darn near certifiable…

  • http://thefloodedfishbowl.com Rae

    Just a side note…I read recently that using tampons and other disposable period protection actually increases cramping pain, length and intensity of periods. Diva cup and cloth pads both show a decrease in pain, flow, and length. Some speculation to how the chemicals in the disposables affect the emotional/psychological aspects as well (disposable = higher levels of pms while natural = lower levels of pms).

  • Anonymous

    that is fascinating!!!

  • Dixibehr

    This study does show that men and women do think differently, at least about some things.

    And there’s nothing wrong with that.

  • Nurse Bee

    Interesting.  I went off the pill because it made me more depressed and emotional (we use FAM–NFP’s protestant cousin :-) ) .  I don’t have any moral objections to hormonal BC, but I never plan to use it again.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Holly-Johnson/1415154084 Holly Johnson

    Wow.  Looking forward to what everyone has to say!  With nine kids in nine years, then something like 12 plus years of breastfeeding, I’ve had maybe….6 cycles in 19 years?  Ten in 19?  Not many, anyway.

    I’ve always been afraid of long term pill usage, due to some related cancers. 

    I’ve also been really skeptical of the pill that completely takes away all periods for young girls.  Not that I want anyone to suffer – far from that – I’ve just been skeptical because I’ve wondered at the long term costs in terms of health.  Were there enough studies?  I don’t know, but I doubt it.  Sometimes we are an “implement now,” “think about it later” society.

    Best wishes, though, EE.  It’s a struggle to keep everything regulated, I think.  The joy of being a human and a woman.

  • Tara S

    Hee! I also call it “Fertility Awareness Method” when answering the “What method of birth control do you use?” doctor’s questions.  It’s more self-explanatory.

  • Sandra Christian Heretic

    The most interesting factoid I know about birth control pills is that it affects how a woman responds to pheromones (you know, those undetectable smells that trigger emotional bonding or instant recoil).  

    Women find different armpit sweat appealing/appalling depending on whether they are fertile (in the fertile part of their cycle) or non-fertile.  this has been demonstrated in labs with smelling sweaty cloths as well as observational data on women in “singles meet-up” situations.

    So women who are on the Pill, always non-fertile, will be attracted (and marry) a different kind of guy than they might if they had been fertile when they met the guy. To the extent that women who meet a man while on the Pill, get married, everything is peachy.  Suddenly, when they start trying to have a baby and she goes off the Pill, the relationship hits the skids and she cries, “you aren’t the man I married!”  but it is more likely that she isn’t reacting to his pheromones the same way now that she is reacting from a fertile situation.

  • http://www.theroadhomewv.blogspot.com Rebecca @ The Road Home

    This is an interesting study.  My husband and I have been talking about how I get so frustrated because my memory is so fuzzy sometimes (I’ve even commented on how I ‘feel like I have man memory’ – ha!).  I was on the Pill for 12 years, off it and using NFP now, and I do feel better overall.  I wonder if length of pill use affects this more and if it can affect how long it takes to go back to ‘normal’ memory?

    All this said, I also wonder if there is an NaPro research done on PTSD symptoms and hormone regulation using something other than the Pill?  Because, you know, you’ve got nothing but time for reading more research ;) .

  • Laura W

    I’d be interested to see where you read this, Rae!  I’ve also found cloth pads and the Diva cup to help, personally.  Diet made a huge difference in healing my crippling cycles, too.  It means (unfortunately) avoiding caffeine and sugar around that time of the month, taking vitamins, and drinking a nasty cramp bark tea, but it also means I don’t have to abuse painkillers to make it through.  

  • Evelyn

    I was on the pill while engaged and rationally overlooked some serious red flags that should have resulted in breaking said engagement.  Now this makes me wonder.

  • Anonymous

    I was on the pill for medical reasons when I met my husband.  I went off of it a couple months before we married and we conceived our first child on our honeymoon.  We remained virgins until we married. 

    You write as if what you are saying is a fact for everyone.  I married the man I would have married on or off the pill.  It did not create any issue for me in terms of picking the wrong man to marry or having sudden problems when I went off of it.  I’m as madly in love with him now as I was when I married him.  Have you met someone who used the pill and married the wrong man because of it?  This theory seems a little out there to me.

    Later on in our marriage the pill was a miracle worker for me during severe post partum depression.  My memory was improved on the pill and my ability to care for my family was improved.  Some women feel worse on the pill but they do not speak for everyone.

  • Laura W

    Elizabeth, thanks for writing about this!   I’m one of those Protestants who have found solace in a successful use of NFP, but I remember very clearly the day a friend told me in all my zeal, “Just remember, Laura, it’s not for everyone.”

    This study is really interesting to me.  I’ve always felt like my memories are more of the “gist” of what happens, but I’ve also been writing down some experiences lately and I’m impressed at the level of detail I can remember.   I wonder if this makes women better writers, poets and novelists?

     I’ve never taken the Pill, mostly because I have a hippy-dippy distrust of most things medical and medicinal.  While it’s not for everybody, NFP has helped me to get in touch with my body enough to acknowledge, “maybe my period doesn’t have to be this painful, emotional, and exhausting.”   I went with diet to try to find a root cause for my health problems, but I respect your pros and cons list and decision to take the Pill.  I probably would too, if I were you. 

    One thing that has always concerned me, though, is the possibility (maybe completely unfounded) that the Pill is causing the high number of (undesired) early miscarriages women experience today (completely aside from the question of whether or not it hinders implantation).  But I might just be making that up.

    I do think that the Pill the way its commonly used can distance a woman from her body’s normal functioning, and could maybe even be construed as male control over women’s fertility (“I want to be able to use your body on demand without consequences”).

    Anyway, enough of my random thoughts.  Thanks!

  • Handsfull

    I was on the pill for about 3yrs and didn’t notice any major differences emotionally – I might check with my husband though, he could have a different story to tell, lol!  The only side effects I noticed were weight gain :( and  waaaaaay less painful periods.  I haven’t wanted to go back on it due to not knowing what these chemicals could do to my body longterm, but I saw a report of a study on 60 Minutes on tv a while ago that showed that long-term users of the pill actually had significantly reduced risks of almost all types of cancer… which made me wonder whether I’d made the right decision or not.

  • Brenda

    Laura-I don’t think there is any evidence from any study that  birth control pills can increase early miscarriages.  

    I’m curious, how is the pill “male control over women’s fertility?”  I take OCPs and it is not because my husband is “controlling” me.  Just curious

  • Brenda

    As someone who works in healthcare (I’m an NP), I have seen a lot of women who really have been helped by OCPs.  Whether it’s mood swings, depression, severe cramps, heavy periods, etc, they can make a real difference in someone’s life.  

  • Elizabeth

    Hi, I’m  new here. 

    Very interesting stuff.  Your post and other commenters’ points about personality types makes me wonder if the study controlled for that.  It seems that one would need to compare the emotional memories of men and women of the same personality type in order to draw good conclusions.  I think the value one places on emotional memory is also important, and that can be, is not necessarily, gendered.  My family doesn’t value that sort of thing at all.  My mom in particular has no patience for all the antics and emotion she broadly categorizes as “drama,” and so I was taught to tamp down on emotional responses to events. 

    I’ve been on the pill for a long time.  It was required by the FDA in order for me to take another medicine that I needed (which can cause birth defects).  I’ve long since stopped taking the second medicine, but stayed on the pill because the benefits were so wonderful:  fewer headaches, much lighter periods and less cramping, clearer skin.  I have not noticed that it alters my mood under normal circumstances.  However, during a time with my life was horribly stressful, I found myself to be almost uncontrollably weepy on the first day of a new pack of pills.  But these issues eased when my life got back on a more even keel.

     

  • Anonymous

    hey, that’s a great insight! i wonder if they tested similar personality types as various personalities respond differently to the same situation–and it may not be entirely a gender based thing.

  • EheartsG

    Great post!

    I went on the Pill right before getting married and continued for a few months into our marriage. It made me feel really different and a bit insane. Though, I am somewhat crazy “as is” anyways. I struggle a lot with extreme emotions, and reading this almost makes me wish I had stuck it out to see if the Pill could have helped me emotionally deal. Perhaps, I felt insane bc I wasn’t experiencing things to the degree I would have normally. Interesting stuff.

    Anyone know of any natural methods for regulating emotions? I would be all ears! We do NFP now and are participating in a study, so the Pill is for sure out. Thanks!

  • Hippie Grandma

    So interesting!

  • Hippie Grandma

    Before I had kids, the pill was a lifesaver as far as bleeding, cramps, PMS, etc.

    After I had kids, I experienced horrible migraines and absolutely no sex drive on the pill, no matter how many different brands we tried (so I ultimately quit), but my PMS didn’t come back until I hit perimenopause.

    I’ve been on estrogen short-term a couple of times, and both times it killed my libido and gave me all sorts of hormone-related problems more commonly seen in menopause (ie, absence of estrogen) — go figure!

    I’m not surprised about the memory / emotional differences.  I suspect there are unique set points for these differences in different people, which would explain why some do better on the pill and others not so much, or worse.  Like most everything, it’s not a one-size-fits-all situation… which is why it shouldn’t be prescribed from pulpits.

    Interesting stuff!

  • Matt F

    I LOVE this study! Do you realize the implications here?! This means that ther is POTENTIALLY a chance of (one day…one glorious day) coming out on the right side of a “discussion” with my wife.

    And on a (very) slightly more pragmatic tone; why am I the only guy commenting here? I am sure that we can all admit that when something effects one half, it always effects the other.

    • http://www.elizabethesther.com elizabeth

      Matt, my friend. Dude. Whatever you do? Don’t tell your wife that the only reason she’s disagreeing with you is because she’s NOT on the pill. Trust me. DON’T GO THERE.

      And kudos for being the only dude weighing into a discussion about periods and hormones. Rock on.

  • D

    I think it would be interesting to match up these results with the reasons why the women weren’t on the pill. It may be that women who have more detail-oriented memories experience the cognitive affects of the pill more intensely and therefore choose another method of birth control. I’ve heard many women say they went off the pill because they “couldn’t think straight” or “went crazy” – which could indicate a change in their emotional memory.

    Also, what do they think causes this? It would be interesting to do the same test but with blood samples to measure estrogen and progesterone and see if one or both had a correlation. And to do the same test with pregnant ladies to see if that has the same effect.

    I have trouble saying that the way women on the pill (and possibly also pregnant women) think is “thinking like a man”. That misleadingly normalizes the male results. But the pill is just estrogen and progesterone – distinctly female hormones. So how can that make us manly? Maybe our memory processes aren’t as gendered as we would like to think.

  • D

    If your wife reads this and finds out that you think the only reason she disagrees with you is because she isn’t on the pill, I think you’ll have another “discussion” on your hands. And trust me, there is no right side of that discussion.

    And yes, I know you’re joking. But the only reason for the humor here is the assumption that you’re actually right in all of those “discussions” and it’s just her crazy hormones that are causing all your problems. Just because it’s framed as a lame joke doesn’t make it any less of any insult.

    Seriously. If you can’t respect your wife with the hormones she’s got right now, the pill isn’t going to change anything. 

  • Tammy

    My husband would pay anything if someone would give me a daily pill that would take away my keen female memory…if he says something mean I can remember it to the letter for years and will add what direction I was facing & the time of day when he said it to me. He cant remember squat. 

    I was in a research study in college where they gave us the pill and tested various changes…they learned I had high lipids while on it and I should NEVER take it…so being a lab rat may have saved my life.  Interesting that women react so differently to it.  

  • Matt F

    Ha ha ha! My wife is around when I write my responses. She knows I am joking, we are friends like that. I know it isn’t her hormones; its her ethnicity. She is Brazilian. I have never known a man who can win an argument with their Latin spouse.

    As to your assumption that I hide things from my wife, or that am anything but respectful to her; you mint want to try engaging in a healthy relationship with someone so you can take down some of those walls. Your sexist view gives you a clouded perspective of positive gender interaction and keeps you bound in a dungeon of mistrust. I hope you find healing and peace. :)

  • Loretta S.

    Right – whose to say the men are remembering the correct parts of a situation? Why is the male memory the standard to be measured against?

  • Anonymous

    I have pretty bad PMS and I’ve found that using a small amount of natural progesterone cream daily IN MY LUTEAL PHASE helps me feel fairly normal.

  • Anonymous

    Laura, thanks to the ubiquity of very sensitive pregnancy tests, this generation knows its pregnant A LOT earlier than any other generation. So it’s not that there are more early miscarriages but that we now know about them. Previously it was “my period was late and heavy.”

  • Stacypro

    Interesting. I lasted exactly 3 cycles on the pill. 1 before getting married and 2 afterwards. It made me horribly depressed, took my sex drive down into the negative numbers (try starting a marriage and crying every time your husband tries to touch you), and basically almost put me over the edge. Also, the effects were getting worse every  month.
    Hormonal birth control is now on that list of things I will never do again.

  • Kersley Fitz

    As an INTJ, I can say it’s not all bad to have low-grade emotions and very few emotion-related memories (except that the ones I do have seem to all revolve around negative emotions). I was on the pill for two years and it wasn’t great. Like my friend told me, “When I went off it, I felt like myself again!” But maybe it reinforces the lower-emotional, introverted personality too much for those of us who are already there? (Did that make sense?)

  • Kersley Fitz

    I use a Diva cup and would never go back, although I think it makes my cramping about the same as a tampon, and a bit more than a pad.

  • Sarah in GA

    wow. very interesting stuff. i have no idea what my personality type is. before i got married i just assumed that it was time to get on the pill. i started taking the pill and had absolutely no sex drive. obviously that led to some issues at the beginning of our marriage (2 young people who had waited to have sex until marriage). then a few years later when we wanted to have children it took my body over a year to get back to normal and it took us 3 years to conceive. i often wish that as a young christian woman someone would have talked to me about this kind of stuff.

  • Anonymous

    Sarah, The pill effects different women in different ways.  I was on it for medical reasons for years before we married and went off it 2 months before our wedding.  We conceived right away and my body went back to normal right away.  It could also depend on the type if pill you were on and the dose.

  • Flourishingmother

    you know what? God is a God of BIG FREEDOM. So if the pill helps you live life more abundantly for Him, then Thank Him and don’t get bogged down in the details. Everyone is DIFFERENT!!! I did the pill a few months in the beginning of my marriage, and for a few months after I stopped nursing my fifth. It just doesn’t work for me. I love some of the pros you mentioned but it makes me feel “synthetic”. :) As long as God is in your decision and you and your husband feel peace about it, then Amen~ I say.

  • Cathy

    I was going to say this was “interesting” – but everyone else here has already said that. :)
    I have a genuine question for you – and please snack on a mint milano before responding. I know many, many Catholic women use the pill, but I sincerely want to know how you (and they)  justify it. I’m not trying to be harsh or judgmental, really. Are you concerned about its abortifacient capabilities? Also wondering how you reconcile it with Church teaching. 
    Again, I’m not trying to be nasty. The women I know say that their lives are so difficult that it justifies their choices. I’ve spent a lifetime trying to bring my choices into God’s will, not the reverse. I want to be patient with women who are seeing things differently. Can you help me understand?

  • Michelle

    I find your positives fascinating Elizabeth. I took the pill for about 10 yrs on and off and when I got off for good (10 years ago) I felt markedly better and experienced none of the positives you mentioned while I was on it. Anyway as good as I felt OFF the pill, I wondered why anyone would enjoy it at all. Just goes to show how different we all are

  • Vosslers

    In studies, they engineer experiences so that the details are already recorded.

  • Vosslers

    I don’t know you, but those were the thoughts (and yours sounded kind and possibly very accurate about women who constantly get offended about things like this) I had. And I’m a girl. My husband and I have a very friendly, joking relationship and it all works best when no one is on guard and we both trust and enjoy. When I get easily offended, my husband always says, “Remember? We’re on the same team.”

  • http://www.likeawarmcupofcoffee.com Sarah Mae

    I was on the pill in high school (period reasons) for couple of months and it made me nutso. Seriously crazy. I went off it and have not been on since. 

    Although now I wouldn’t go on it for other reasons. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/brendan.drown Brendan Drown

    Okay, I get the bit about Mint Milanos. Having said that, I think that for you, the Pill is a good thing. Obviously with 5 children, you are not trying to stop having babies. (Although Bill Cosby explained why his family had five children–they didn’t want six!) For you, and for your family, the Pill is a good thing!

  • http://bluebonnetreads.wordpress.com Hannah C.

    I went on the pill in college, after my periods started coming every 2 weeks instead of once a month. (I later found out that this was a side effect of a steroid shot that I’d had thanks to a nasty cough. They didn’t inform me that the shot could mess with my cycle.)

    I was extremely moody while on the pill. The day I stopped taking them, I could deal with life again. It was that crazy. I believe my mother had a similar experience 20+ years ago. Because of my experience with the pill, I wouldn’t take it again. Also, everything I’ve read about the pill pretty much expects that one will have to try different pills before hitting on the right combination. I’d really rather not mess with all that if I can avoid it.

    As for memory, I’m not especially detail-oriented to begin with, I guess. I’m an ISFJ and it’s rare that I will notice small details. 

  • http://musings--aloud.blogspot.com Leah

    Ohhhhh, so she’s like that because of her race/ethnicity, not because of her gender??  Ohhhhhh okayyyy!! -__-
    If it’s not one stereotypical attribution, it’s another!

  • A Catholic woman

    Cathy,
    show me the Church teaching that does not allow the Pill for medicinal purposes? Guess what? You won’t find it. You will instead find in Humane Vitae where it says that when used medicinally it is ok.  And I think if someone is ready to lose her mind, then medicine is needed. Don’t you?

  • A Catholic woman

    Look into the studies on OCPs and heart disease risk in women. You might think twice, especially if heart disease runs in your family.

  • Cathy

    I know that medicines which we take for one reason, but have an unintended side effect that is negative, are allowed by the Church.  It appears that perhaps Elizabeth (and others who comment) are taking it for other reasons than contraception, but I think many who read this may think it is being promoted as a contraceptive, no? 
    I think my comment clearly stated that I was trying to understand. I wasn’t being snarky, I really am trying to get an understanding.
    Also, there are MANY medicines for mental disorders that do not have the risk that hormonal contraceptives present (the least of which being that I might abort my own child.)

  • Matt F

    Exactly! I can draw it out in a cartoon if you prefer… He he he. :)

  • http://moonchild11.wordpress.com/ Sarah Moon

    I’m so glad you’re willing to post this “TMI” blog post. As my boyfriend and I start to talk more and more about marriage, this issue comes to mind frequently. 

    I’m not Catholic, and I have pretty regular periods, so if I used the pill, it would be for birth control purposes only. But I’m not sure how I feel about it. I don’t believe that sex is ONLY for procreation (though I also don’t like the idea of separating sex from procreation completely like our culture often tries to do), and I don’t think it’s wrong to prevent birth. But I’ve heard a lot of bad about the pill- that it messes with hormones and emotions, kills a woman’s sex drive, can cause cancer, etc…

    But there are so many conflicting accounts. I’m not sure what to believe. It’s probably different for everyone. Still, I’m glad you’re willing to share your experience and I hope to learn from it. :)  

  • Anonymous

    Hey Matt: lay off the condescending remarks. This is your last warning. EE.

  • Katharine

    Clearly, the Chuch does not forbid the bcp for medicinal uses. However, knowing that the pill prevents pregnancy from occurring and has the possibility of being abortificient, common sense tells me a fertile Catholic woman shouldn’t have sex while taking it.
    There are Catholic women who would die if they got pregnant who refuse the pill. Perhaps it would be permissible to get yourself sterilized so you don’t kill your unborn babies while you take the pill … but that surely depends on who you ask. Wonder who’d be right?

  • Anonymous

    Yes there are many meds for mental illness.  One of the ones I took induced violent, vivid, suicidal images in my head. Read the side effects on the antidepressants and you will see there are some very bad ones.  It could have cost me my life.  The medications I am on now can cause miscarriage and birth defects and none of them are the pill.  A miscarriage is not the same as an abortion.  I think that might be where the frustration comes in–the accusation the someone taking hormones for medical reasons is aborting a child every month.  The research I did at the time for the dose and type I was on said otherwise. 

  • Maryann

    I think it’s fine to use the pill for medical reasons, but if someone is struggling with depression and anxiety, they may want to try a med specifically for that, such as an SSRI. I am NOT a doctor, just talking from my own personal experience of having a depression diagnosis about ten years ago. I’m not on the pill or any meds at this time, but if I did get depressed again, I think I’d choose a low-dose SSRI over the pill for various reasons. Of course SSRIs have side effects too. (Insert official-sounding discuss-with-your-doctor voiceover here.)

    On a somewhat different note, one of my friends has a childhood sexual abuse history and EMDR therapy has helped her with flashbacks and PTSD. I don’t know much about it, but thought I’d mention it in case anyone else has similar struggles. EMDR is not a med, or a personality type (though it sounds like one). It stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy. I don’t really understand it but it’s helped her recovery.

  • Maryann

    But you know…I’d feel nervous trying to get pregnant on an SSRI, even if a psychiatrist said a certain type was ok. It’s a tricky situation balancing fertility, safety, mood and everything else in life. All I know is, I thank God I don’t need any meds for depression at this time. That healing is a gift I don’t take for granted. And some people just don’t get that gift no matter how much they pray for it. It’s so easy for me or anyone else to say, “why don’t they just do this or try that” but our bodies and minds are so complicated that treatments are not one-size-fits-all. (Except for Milanos of course.)

  • JoAnn

    if I could still take the pill, I would be on it for the rest of my life.  Every Day!  I LIKE being ‘regular’.  Regular is worth small sacrifices.  Men are happy too- so don’t think that we’re up on them because we’re over emotional in some cases.  happy is good too.  Regular and happy…yep, I’d take it.

  • KatR

    The post above outlines Elizabeth’s reasons. I doubt, though, that you would find any reason acceptable, as you just stated your belief that taking birth control pills is a choice “outside God’s will”. Kind of hard to find a reason that stacks up against that one, isn’t it?

    • http://www.elizabethesther.com elizabeth

      What Kat said.

  • Anna Mathie

    I don’t quite understand that.  I mean, sure you’ll be “regular” in the sense of bleeding by the calendar, but your system won’t actually be regular, in the sense of regularly following the natural progression of hormones and events that constitute the female cycle.  Why’s that a good thing?  To me it would be like plastering over rotting holes in a wall and thinking the wall is fixed.  I’d much rather be a week longer or shorter or whatever than the “perfect” cycle and have the right stuff happening inside.

  • Anonymous

    I disagree that a women taking the pill is killing her unborn babies every month.  I researched it extensively based on the dose and type I was on.  I had no break thru ovulation. 

    It seems that you are implying a woman who takes any medication that can harm an unborn baby should not have sex.

    35% of pregnancies in women 40 to 44 end in miscarriage and 50% of pregnancies in women over 45 end in miscarriage.  It is more likely that a women over 40 miscarry a baby than a women on the pill.  Should they not have sex either?

  • Anonymous

    Katharine, I wanted to add that the church forbids sterilization under all circumstances.  There are however many Catholic women who have had life threatening illnesses during/after pregnancy who have chosen sterilization.  That God insists that these women should remain open to having a baby every time they have sex is certainly something that is hard to accept. 

  • Guest

    I used to joke that tampons were the greatest invention since sliced bread, etc!!  But, the last few/many years I have reconsidered all this.  I think I have used one or two in the last 5+ years.  I have even used some white cloths when I was just here at the house.  I don’t think I ever want to shove cotton inside my body again.  Funny how I have changed, when I used to think they were so great!!  I even made myself use one on my first (or one of my first) periods, and I even got to where I could use o.b.  I’m just starting to think we should not be putting a lot of things in our bodies. But these are just my thoughts–I have even rethought pierced ears, etc.  I guess my age is showing!!  :)  I guess I would think the more natural, and less extra-chemicals, the better.  I think I am about ready for menopause, but I could have ten more years to go——:(  There are a lot of joys in life being pregnant and giving birth/life, but sometimes I just wish God would send the stork!!  :)  (but, this is from someone who has never had a child)  I love learning more, though!!  And, I like the trend toward more natural things that I have seen for a while now!  :)  Thanks everyone for all the info.  :)

  • Cathy

    “It seems that you are implying a woman who takes any medication that can harm an unborn baby should not have sex.”Truthfully, I think that a woman in that situation should use NFP.
    I believe all women who want to prevent pregnancy should use NFP.
    And if it “fails” and they get pregnant?
    They should trust God.
    They might die.
    Their babies might die.
    Aren’t I a radical?
    Yep.

  • Cathy

    It is hard to accept.
    Being a follower of Jesus is hard to accept.
    I’m tired of apologizing for that truth.
    It simply is what it is – a difficult and dangerous road to Heaven.

  • KatR

    “Radical” wasn’t the word I was thinking of, no.

  • http://evenonesparrow.blogspot.com even one sparrow

    Hurray!!  You have disqus!!  I’m nerdily obsessed with disqus.  Thank you for getting it – it makes commenting much easier.

    I’m really struggling with whether or not to go back on the pill.  I was on the pill for 5-6 years before we went off to have our daughter.  And now I’m not on anything because 1) I’m breastfeeding, and 2) all the things I read about abortive effects of the pill.  If you have any research that would help in this decision (or anyone reading this comment), I would so so so appreciate it.

    The thing is, I L O V E D being on the pill, and I wish I could just go back on it (once babygirl is done breastfeeding).  But because I’m not a doctor or scientist and don’t know all the inner-workings of the pill, I’m nervous to … act.  To do something inadvertently. 

    Just the things I’ve heard… really freak me out.  And I want to go back on and pretend that it’s okay, but I want to KNOW it’s okay.  So if anyone out there has anywhere I can go for information, please let me know.

    I *am* considering NFP but… man, does it seem complicated.  

  • April

    I’m not against birth control. It gives women a degree of control over their reproductive systems, which is good. I’m not on it, personally, because I’m not comfortable with the idea of something altering me physically and emotionally. There are so many medications out there for women who struggle with depression or PMS, but the difference between that and birth control pills, is that the medications are made specifically for these particular issues. In other words, a licensed psychiatrist prescribed it to you. Are psychiatrists prescribing birth control as a means to help cope with emotional issues or disorders? I’m not sure about that. Anyway, these are just some of the thoughts popping into my head after reading your post. Very interesting. Thank you for posting it.

  • Anonymous

    Actually Cathy you come across to me as arrogant and nasty assuming that women in these difficult situations are taking the easy way out or not trusting God.  You started off innocent enough asking a question but now you come across clearly as someone who had an agenda asking the question in the first place.  The women I know in these situations would do anything they believed GOD was asking them to do.  It is the mixed up theology you define as holiness that I really have no patience for.

  • Anonymous

    I’m confused by which point you are trying to make.  You did say, “I know that medicines which we take for one reason, but have an unintended side effect that is negative, are allowed by the Church.”  So are you saying a woman can not take the pill but she can take other medication that kills a baby and that is ok if she uses NFP to avoid a pregnancy but gets pregnant anyway.  The miscarriage or harm to the baby or mother’s death or disability is just part of the difficult and dangerous road to heaven.    But somehow this is different if she is on the pill for serious medical reasons?  Or that if she is on the pill for medical reasons she is not on the road to heaven?  You definitely lost me.

  • http://bluebonnetreads.wordpress.com Hannah C.

    I’m not JoAnn, but if your cycle changes in length from cycle to cycle and you have long periods, I can definitely understand why one might want to have it regulated via birth control!! In fact that may be evidence of natural hormones being out of whack. :)

  • Anna Mathie

    Sure, but the Pill doesn’t give you back the correct sequence of hormones – it substitutes a different one.  And it’s not that abnormal to be irregular anyway – I think half the reason people think so these days is that so many people are on the pill now it has shaped our idea of normal.  And if there is an underlying problem, wouldn’t it be better to address it, not just override the symptoms?

  • Anna Mathie

    Sure, but the Pill doesn’t give you back the correct sequence of hormones – it substitutes a different one.  And it’s not that abnormal to be irregular anyway – I think half the reason people think so these days is that so many people are on the pill now it has shaped our idea of normal.  And if there is an underlying problem, wouldn’t it be better to address it, not just override the symptoms?

  • Falfie4

    Oh wow!  This is so enlightening!  I am an INFP, so I feel all those crazy emotions very deeply too, but then I get stuck inside myself with them.  It’s not fun.  Add to that the ridiculous mood swings that I had with my cycle and I felt like I was always on the verge of loosing it.  Birth control was a life saver to me, and my marriage!  It is kind of scary that it can alter significant parts of who I am, but I would rather be a more sane version of me than being whole and always on the verge of a meltdown.