I gotta be honest. At this point, I’m watching American Idol because Harry Connick Jr. Yep. Just Harry. Well, OK. The contestants, too. But seriously. Harry. He’s genius. He’s such a genius, in fact, that I’m a bit worried your average TV audience CANNOT keep up. Even I–brilliant writer that I am har-har!!–had to rewind and replay sections of the premiere just to catch all his dazzling one-liners.
Um, did you catch this? He’s a Mensa? With a score of 143. YEAH. HOT.
The guy is so quick on his feet that half the time the contestants stare at him like: Whaaaa? Even JLo turns to him and is all: “Pentatonics, say what?”
And he’s also blunt-spoken. At one point in the premiere, JLo starts calling him “Hatchet Harry” because he doesn’t mince words or coddle the contestants. I’ve started calling him #TheVelvetHatchet because OBVIOUSLY.
*HappySigh* Dude, the chemistry and hilarity between the judges makes this SUCH captivating television. It’s SO refreshing!
So, in honor of My New Favorite Judge, here are a few of my favorite #VelvetHatchetHarryisms:
Upon seeing a cheerleader walk in: “I almost wore that exact same outfit!”
When a contestant doesn’t recognize him: “See, I’m actually SO famous that what you’re seeing here is a hologram. My real self is at home in bed.”
After one of the contestants tells Keith Urban he’s so handsome: “And I’m just…me.”
When one of the contestants freezes up after singing a line about biting his tongue: “That’s a good time to bite your tongue.”
When a fifteen year old girl sings about wanting to ‘shave him smooth’: “As an artist you need to find songs that are age-appropriate. You singing about shaving me smooth creeps me out.”
To contestants who aren’t that talented: “I just don’t think you’re a good enough singer.”
And then there was THIS moment which made my heart explode into GlitterSparkleJoy:
So, did you watch the American Idol premiere this week? What were your favorite moments? Did you like what you saw? Do you want to watch more? What could have been better/different? Is there anything you missed from previous seasons?