Category Archives: Humor

Everything I know about God I learned in my laundry pile

Posted on January 10, 2012 by elizabeth

The first lesson you learn in motherhood is that when you create a human, you also spend a lot of time cleaning up after it. Which, if you think about it, is pretty much what God has been doing since … Continue reading →

Posted in Birth Control, Catholicism, Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor | 10 Comments

My twins are four.

Posted on December 8, 2011 by elizabeth

My twins turn four today and I wish had something profoundly mother-y to say but the reality is that I’m still so damn tired from giving birth to them that the only coherent thing coming out of my mouth is: … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Twins!! | 23 Comments

Because I just plain suck at being a work outside the home mom

Posted on November 22, 2011 by elizabeth

I quit my job. Yeah, the one I just started. I KNOW! I KNOW! OK? I know. I’m lame. But here’s the plain truth: I suck at working outside my home. I miss my kids too much. I don’t handle, … Continue reading →

Posted in Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor, Life in The OC | 45 Comments

Now, let’s talk about something REALLY important! (What I’m wearing to #Relevant11)

Posted on October 18, 2011 by elizabeth

I’ve been going through a “sackcloth and ashes” phase. It looks something like this: This is what happened after I arrived home from Bolivia. Somehow, wearing billowy skirts and long-sleeved shirts gave me a safe place to grieve the extreme … Continue reading →

Posted in Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor | 26 Comments

Top 10 answers to ALLLLLLL your burning questions!!!

Posted on September 6, 2011 by elizabeth

Well, my segment on Fox News went awesome but it’s taking forever for the video clip to go up, soooooo, I’m moving on to a new topic (because I get bored waiting around and plus also? I need to lay … Continue reading →

Posted in Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor | 31 Comments

The mall is trying to kill me (I’m serious!)

Posted on August 26, 2011 by elizabeth

I stink at clothes shopping. It just totally overwhelms my ADD brain. There are too many options, especially when it comes to little girl clothes. I’m always in awe of moms who are able to put together color-coordinated, matchy-matchy outfits … Continue reading →

Posted in Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor, Twins!! | 18 Comments

Don’t Call Me a MILF. Please.

Posted on July 12, 2011 by elizabeth

Being a MILF is all the rage these days. It’s no longer enough to bear and raise our children. Now, moms have the added pressure of needing to look like hot-n-sexy MILFs all day. A MILF wouldn’t be caught dead … Continue reading →

Posted in Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor, SmartAssery, Societal Commentary | 51 Comments

It’s summer. It must be time for a breakdown.

Posted on June 7, 2011 by elizabeth

I’m feeling all out of sorts. I think this is because I do not have clear goals right at this moment. I am an intensely driven, ambitious, complicated personality and I like tangible goals. This is why by the time … Continue reading →

Posted in Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor | 32 Comments

Organizational Tip For Big Families: how to manage shoes

Posted on March 16, 2011 by elizabeth

There are seven people in my family. Last time I checked, we each had two feet. Each of the children have two pairs of shoes. My husband has about three. Wait, this is sounding like a word problem and I … Continue reading →

Posted in Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor, Parenting--toughest job out there | 15 Comments

The 24 Hour Outfit: a mom’s best friend

Posted on February 28, 2011 by elizabeth

This post lovingly dedicated to all new moms everywhere. “So, uh, Mom? You gonna wear your jammies to the grocery store?” my fashion-conscious middle-schooler asks me. “Technically, sweetheart, these aren’t jammies,” I reply. “They’re yoga pants.” “Yeah, but you wore … Continue reading →

Posted in Her Royal Mommy-Ness, Humor | 24 Comments