Yes, I wrote about the crazy preschool obsession insanity that has gripped parents everywhere.
Yes, I vowed never to be "one of those parents."
And then I got pregnant with twins.
Before the twins, I had lofty dreams of hours spent baking apple cobbler from scratch with Jude, creating alphabets using Play-Doh, working through two preschool workbooks, and perhaps sewing Christmas place-mats together. I even bought the fabric.
The reality has been: Jude watches cartoons and eats lots of unhealthy snacks while Mom falls asleep next to him on the couch.
I'm such a failure! I was bawling this over the phone to Matt, sniffing, worrying, sobbing, not making any sense, sick with a bladder infection, exhausted.
"No," Matt replies, "you're making two babies. Put Jude in school. Get some rest. Everything's going to be OK."
Oh. What? It's that simple?
So I did it. I put Jude in pre-K at the Montessori school I've been eying for two years. And then I came home, feeling terribly guilty. Nonetheless, I tucked myself into bed and promptly fell asleep. For two hours.
And Jude? He had a fantastic day, did lots of interactive, exploratory, Montessori-ish stuff and when I picked him up---he was ready for a nap. Which meant (oh joy!) I got to take two naps that day!
I still wish I could have been the homeschool mom. I really, really, really wanted to be that mom.
But I just don't have the energy. And that's OK.
How often as moms do we try to live up to some self-imposed standard of perfection? It's exhausting!
I think we all need someone who tells us it's OK to admit we can't do it all, to remind us that we're human, and that sometimes (like when we're pregnant with twins for goodness sakes!), it's OK to rest.
I hope you have someone like this in your life. Someone who tells you that no-one expects you to do everything, only to do the best you can.
And that really, the world won't stop spinning just because you go take a nap.