A Husband's Guide To Getting Laid (by his wife, OF COURSE! sheesh, what kind of blog do you think this IS?!)

While I'm doing my best to be all sparkly and network-y at the blog conference, I've asked KC of "Some Wise Guy" to guest post for me. KC is a legit dude and makes me laugh. I likes his straight-up, manly-man humor. So, before you ladies get all inflammatory on his ass, just do as I do and chuckle a little. Men are....different, y'know? xo. EE. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If husbands could summarize how we feel about sex in one word it would be... more. We want more sex with our wives.

And why not?
 It's naked, legal, healthy and God made it fun. (Thank you, Jesus!)

But there's a catch: sex is a different experience for men than it is for women. I've heard it said that women tend to be more emotionally and mentally stimulated while men are more visually stimulated. This is due to the fact that we men simply don't have enough blood in our bodies to form a complex thought when our beloved is beside us wearing nothing but her birthday suit.

The challenge for men is that, while we want more sex with our wives, sometimes we don't know how to make our dreams a reality.

So, here are 5 foolproof tips I dare you to try:

  1. Do chores. Say what? KC, have you been watching Friends reruns? (Actually, I own the entire series on DVD). Women are mental multitaskers. If you don't want her thinking about the garbage while you're trying to put on the moves, remember to take out the trash before it starts overflowing. Bonus points if you do chores without being asked.
  2. Buy "just because" flowers (or candy). Of course, it's expected that you'd shower your wife with tokens of affection on major holidays, her birthday and your anniversary (if you forget those, get ready to turn in your balls). But if you really want to make her swoon, pick up some of her favorite flowers or candy on a random Tuesday and write "just because" in the card. You can thank me later.
  3. Make out (without expectation). Every time you kiss her, she shouldn't have to wonder if sex is all you want. I'm not saying we men would argue against that, but ya know what? Sometimes it's really nice to just sit on the couch and kiss my sweetheart. $5 says your wife won't complain and it might lead to more "opportunity."
  4. Go on dates. Wives work, cook, clean and are beautiful to boot. Show your appreciation by taking her out on the town for a good time. Whether that's a peaceful candlelight dinner or a karaoke at a dive bar, treat her special.
  5. Say "I love you" out loud and often. Women need to know in their minds and hearts that their man loves them--and he's not just saying he loves her to get her into bed. Husbands should communicate their love through action and words.

Now, before the comments explode into flames berating me as a chauvinist pig let me ask the ladies a question:

If your husband..

•                Did chores around the house without being asked

•                Brought home your favorite flowers on a random Thursday

•                Kissed you long and hard without tearing off your clothes

•                Took you out on fancy and fun dates

•                Said "I love you" and acted it out daily....

would you want to jump him more often?