Want A Big Family? How Embarrassing!

Sure, I've been getting the usual "oh-my-gosh-you're-crazy" line when I tell people I'm pregnant with my 4th and 5th child.

But something else has been happening, too. All kinds of women are telling me in hushed voices, over email, or aside from the group that really, they wish they had more children, too.

I was surprised at first. Not just by these honest confessions, but by the secretive manner in which they are made. It's like these women feel embarrassed about their desire for more children. No-one seems comfortable to admit to the group that they want more children.

The reasons for not having more range from: "we can't afford it" or "I have to work." But the most frequently stated reason for not having more children? "My husband doesn't want more."

One mother told me that after their third baby her husband just up and had a vasectomy without even consulting her. I couldn't help but feel so terribly sad for her!

Because not so long ago I believed the same thing about big families. I always thought I'd have only 2 children. I even called Number 3 "our little surprise!" I am horrified by that, now.

Children are not accidents, they are blessings! I couldn't imagine my life without one of my precious blessings! And I am so thankful that God didn't listen to what I thought was 'the best' for my life. He knows so much better.

When I was in college, I was applauded for desiring a higher education, a successful career. But wanting a big family? How mundane! How embarrassing! Didn't I want "more" than "just being a mom?"

I don't know what it is about this twin pregnancy, but I've just stopped caring what everyone says about how terrible, irresponsible, mundane, expensive and difficult big families are.

I laugh off the naysayers and I smile at the future. God has blessed me. This is all I need to know.