Super Freak

"Are these really all yours?" the lady says to me, pointing at my five kids.

"Ya, they're mine," I say.

I want to point at her boobs and say, "And are those really yours?"

I don't, though, because Jewel is looking at me like, Dude, did someone just ask us that, AGAIN? So I just roll my eyes and we keep walking.

'Cuz which is freaky-er? A woman who reproduces or a woman who injects plastic water bags into her breasts?

Here in The OC, I'm considered a freak. But what I really want to know is: am I super freak-a?